The milkshake and soda thief

Wes and I have completed the Long Trail in Vermont. It was definitely an experience. I don’t have a whole lot to say about the last four days, other than waking up to snow when you have 44 miles until the end of the trail is really no fun, so I’ll take it back about a week or so ago to when we hiked out of a town called Rutland.

We’d stayed at a hiker hostel that was donation based and included laundry, showers, breakfast, a bunk for sleeping, and was in very close proximity to a shuttle that would bring us back to the trail head. It was fantastic. We had one of our last major peaks to get over that day, Killington. We’d heard rumor that there was a restaurant on the peak that served food until 3 and beer until 4. It was a 6 mile hike and we were determined to get there in time. We had a bit of a later start than we had meant, but still thought we had plenty of time. At about 2 o’clock, we checked our mileage and found out the official trail skirted the peak, so we’d have to take a .2 mile side trail to reach the top. It’d been said to be steep, but we figured we could handle it. By 2:30 though, we still weren’t at the spur trail and I was losing steam. We were really cutting it close to the 3 o’clock food deadline, which we were banking on since we didn’t pack out an extra meal for the night. I told Wes to go, JUST GO! He hikes faster than me with his unnaturally long legs and it seemed more likely that he’d make it in time. He promised to order me something and hauled up the trail. In time, I’d made it the spur trail and was headed to the summit towards a well deserved cold brew. Instantly though, I realized what I should have known all along…. a steep trail out here doesn’t mean steep walking, it means large rocks for climbing over, literally. With both my trekking poles clasped helplessly in my left hand, I started the ascent, grabbing onto surrounding trees and boulders to help hoist myself upwards.

I’ve forgotten to mention that it was raining that day, and before leaving town, I’d purchased a brand new, purple, ‘One-Size-Fits-All’ poncho. After being soaked through to my undies days before, I wanted to be sure nothing in my pack, or on my body, would get an ounce of moisture. I’d been wearing my poncho and rain jacket all morning, even now, after the rain had quit. With the combined humidity and my profuse sweating, I was creating quite the personal sauna. I’d made it maybe 50 feet up the peak when a slew of hikers came descending towards me. With my head down, concentrating on my feet, I headed up a little ways more towards a spot where I could rest and be out of the way. When I looked up at the oncoming descending crowd, I heard a voice say, “Wow, this has to be a first. I don’t think I’ve ever seen a grimace while on trail.” To myself, I thought, “I suppose I’m not particularly thrilled right now, but I wouldn’t say I’m so unhappy that I’m grimacing.” As I mustered up an audible chuckle, I also made sure to show an all toothed smile that said, “I’m no grimacing hiker. I’m having a wonderful, sweaty time.” He followed up his original statement by saying, “Is the Hamburglar behind you? Because I could really use a cheeseburger.” Now I was really confused. What was this crazy guy talking about? Then my mind was suddenly flooded with images of Ronald McDonald and his gang of fast food villains. There had been a giant purple character, I think… and he must have been called a Grimace. By the time I’d realized what he was talking about, he’d hiked by me and was now walking further away. All I could say was, “ha… nope, no cheeseburgers…but hopefully I’m on my way to get one…” The joke had been totally lost by then, leaving me to feel a fool.

I shook it off, my mind once again focused on food and beer. I let the remaining twelve hikers by me, annoyed at their snail-like pace.It’s as if they had no idea how much of a hurry I was in. FOOD PEOPLE! AND BEER! I HAVE A MATTER OF MINUTES HERE! MOVE! With the lollygaggers out of my way, I began to haul uphill again, finally reaching the summit. Out of breath and dripping with sweat, I looked around and saw nothing but a few other hikers. I didn’t see anything remotely close to a building that would be give me what I wanted! I stumbled across the rocky summit looking this way and that, hoping to at least see Wes somewhere. I didn’t see him. Up ahead, I saw that the trail continued through endless bogs, so I headed that way. At least another two tenths of a mile later I heard a whirring sound. That had to be good news. I walked on and came across an opening in the trees. As I stepped beyond the trees, the whirring having gotten much louder, I found myself looking at a running gondola with people loading and unloading atop a ski slope. People in loafers and clean, day time close were just milling about while I was breathing heavily in my sweat sodden clothes and mud splattered legs. There was even a wedding party having their pictures taken in the fog and foliage. I had hiked and climbed through rain and mud for six miles while there were people up here who had ridden a gondola?! Where was the just in that?! They stared at me like I was a mad women as I aggressively sped walked towards the building ahead. All I could think was, “Wes better have made it on time. I need food.” I entered the building and frantically looked around. All the food lines were closed and my heart sank. Then I saw a tall, lanky guy wearing all black with his hood up standing at a counter with two burritos sitting in front of him. Wes had made it. I made my towards him, chose a side to go with my burrito, and followed Wes to the bar. He had arrived at the restaurant at 2:58. The line for food had been closed behind him. We (he) did it. We weren’t going to starve that night. After our meals and a couple of beers each, we headed out of the restaurant, taking the trail route rather than the gondola that every other human was loading. We hiked/climbed the spur trail back down to a shelter where we called it quits for the day. It’d only been a little over 6 miles for the day, but it was strenuous and stressful. No shame in ending the day on a full belly, even if it was a little early.

We woke up the next morning to continue hiking along, as we had been doing every day previously. I really don’t have any other stories to tell of this adventure. We met more cool people, hiked more miles, and listened to more books and podcasts. Overnight hiking season is pretty much done now, as temperatures are having a hard time getting above 45 degrees during the day. It was a good season full of many different views and lots of different terrain. I’ll continue to write and share pictures. Please keep following along!

Erin the Grimace

The Grimace himself

A hidden toad

What does this look like? A million different rock cairns? It is. Really, look closely. There are tons.

Oh, okay, snow.

Our first day on trail.

Our last day on trail